Hollow Storm

I ran into someone today.  Literally, nearly.  Little Silvertip Mauls the Horned Spirit.   It's a name I've heard of before.   She's Athro, which is big enough news as it is, but some of the rumors that go with her are pretty amazing, or pretty far-fetched.   I was on my best behaviour around her, that's for sure.  And she didn't throat me, so I must have done alright.   I can't explain it- but there's a part of me that is insanely curious about her, and then there is a tugging deep in my gut, to be careful around her too.   I am going to have to tread very carefully with this. 

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I really think I may not like Justin.   And yet I keep running into him.   Water, feathers, sayings of that nature seem appropriate.   But not easy.   Met a newcomer to the sept too.  A lupus Gnawer named Garbage Barge.   Definitely can see smell where that name comes from.   Still, something about her seems a whole lot more friendly than Justin.  

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Man, if packs can hear into our thoughts, can they hear into our secrets?  If I ask Thane or Draco about this, will they realize there's something I desperately don't want found out?

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Just some random chit chat with the local Corax.   I'd been told as a cub to be careful with them; they're great at getting info for you- and that's just the problem.    I'll be careful with her, but wow, she's really high ranked.  Assuming that the Corax deal with rank in a similar manner as we do.   And she's been through a lot!  I can't imagine being older but stuck in a teen body.

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Just a whole bunch of people at the house today, so got to meet some new faces.   There's a Corax, who is apparently way older than she looks.  And a couple of Gnawers.  The one that /looks/ meaner, actually comes across kind of nicer.  The other?   Nothing but sarcasm and attitude.   Maybe he's just compensating.  He is a Gnawer after all.   Got to listen in on more of what's going on.   I could be really helpful in this situation, maybe.  But ... I dunno if I am supposed to be that open with things.   I wish I had someone to talk to about this.

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Met with Charlene in the Glade.   That place really unnerves me.   I imagine anywhere in the umbra will at this point.   It's like having to learn all over again, and sometimes I get the feeling they see me more as a predator than normal.    I was afraid that they'd notice something about me, say something.   I have to be careful until I know for sure how everything works.   God, will I ever even know?    I spent several hours with Charlene and the spirit, and I feel like I am making some headway.  It will take time and practice.   This, I can do.

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I may have to distance myself from Briari if she's going to be like this.   I don't like being pressed over and over again with the same question, especially after I've given my answer.    I've also decided, that without a doubt, my anxiety seems to cause me problems.   The more stressful or intense a situation, the easier it is for me to get distracted.    How do you get better at not feeling the pressure of intense situations?   Especially when you're like me... not very strong, or skilled, in the whole survive a brawl area?

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Had quite the startle as someone came upstairs at the vault when I was ... well, really concentrating on something else.   It was an old member of this sept returned.  A metis theurge.    He knew my family, and had figured out where my sept was before it fell.   This is really worrisome.  The others hadn't put anything together, but he did in all of ten minutes.   /And/ he's a theurge.   Crap.  Double crap.

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Met with Tuesday again.   I feel like I may  be able to learn things from her.   She's a metis, and normally they don't get a handle on fetishes like she has.  Which, strikes familiar for my situation.   I can't tell her that, of course.  But if she's willing to talk about it, I'm willing to listen.

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Met another of the Sept's metis today.   They have a lot, but I guess that's to be expected.   I've heard that they even had a metis alpha for awhile, and their beta is a rank four metis Walker right now.  If that isn't enough to encourage the metis population to this area, I don't know what would.   Something off with his legs.  He's also Fury - which strikes me odd.  I'd been told they'll keep their male metis, but not their regular males, or often, not their female metis.   Seems very odd to me, but it's not like I know their ways.    Sue seemed nice enough though, and he's going to teach me a rite when I become an official member!

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